Wait, Its Been Five Years?

Wow...just wow!

How can it be?!

My last blog was about taking a risk, I was waiting to hear back about a part-time job.  I got that part-job, and have been there five years already! cRaZy!  Obviously not a faithful blogger!  My Family, cleaning houses, the new job and my wedding business have filled up all that precious time which is a good thing!

Two of my five children got married...my cup is full of love!  My middle child moved south and now our home is a bit quieter with only two at home still.  "A blink of an eye"...I believe it!

I am challenged to think hard about the last five years,  and answer my own question, "am I a better person then I was a year ago, or how about five years ago?"

Stay tuned!

Life is Risky Business~

I'm not a Bob Marley fan, nor could I tell you one song he sings; he is a musician, right?  Anyway a friend posted the following quote of his on Facebook this morning and it really resonates with me as I wait to hear back about a potential job.

"To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain.  To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing." Bob Marley

What does God's word say about risk?   There are actually several verses, and all seem to say that it is God who makes everything prosper or not...so yes, take the risk with the right motives!

Matthew 25:14-30

"For it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted to them his property.  To one he gave five talents, to another two, to another one, to each according to his ability.  Then he went away.  He who had received the five talents went at once and traded with them, and he made five talents more.  So also he who had two talents made two talents more.  But he who had received the one talent went and dug in the ground and hid his master's money... (no risk) you should get out your bible and read the rest of that one!!!  Not a good turn out for that guy.

Ecclesiastes 11: 4 - 6 

He who observes the wind will not sow, and he who regards the clouds will not reap.  As you do not know the way the spirit comes to the bones in the womb of a woman with child, so you do not know the work of God who makes everything.  In the morning sow your seed, and at evening withhold not your hand, for you do not know which will prosper, this or that, or whether both alike will be good.  

1 Timothy 6: 9-10 

But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction.  For the LOVE OF MONEY is a root of all kinds of evils.  It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs. 

Oh the quandaries of a 48 year old woman!

I NEED a project on a budget!!!

I'm in the middle of raising the last two of my five awesome kids...it's a good time for me to do a little something for hubby and I, right?    When Momma's happy everyone is happy!   Isn't that how that saying goes?   ;p

Since I have been feeling very depressed these days my husband said I need to "get off Facebook and Pinterest," and "find a project" that I want to do for myself.  He may be sorry he said that...because I'm going to take on our bedroom as my "project."

...we've lived here nine years and haven't done a darn thing to it!  Over time our kids have given us money and Lowes gift cards to get us started...but we've often used the money and cards on groceries and home repairs.  Sound familiar?   

First I need to set up my budget, some rules and boundries.

My Budget:

I'm going try to keep it under $100.  We don't need furniture, just a make over.   I have a $50.00 gift card that I found tucked away, and I will commit to only $50.00 cash, which I will attain hopefully when my friend sells some homeschool books for me on eBay.

The Rules:  

It can't be too feminine, it needs to be something that fits the two of us...since it is "our" room.

Boundaries:  

I need to remember that family comes first, however, when I have served them, and they are taken care of, it's ok for me to be busy about my project.  I don't need to come to every "mom call."  
I will give my self till the end of April to complete this project, which is a realistic time frame.


BEFORE PICTURES:

There are not many options for where to place our bed, since the room is not all that big.  This is where the bed was put 9 years ago and it hasn't ever been moved.  I'd like to angle it between the two windows for something different.  Hubby is not real keen on the idea, but I think I'm gonna give it a try.   I need to be sure he can see the tv for watching the news at night.  I personally could live without, but whatever!   

Our room is the "catch all" room, honestly, why is that?  I remember my mom saying the same thing.  Hmmm...maybe that's just a hereditary thing, who knows.  ;)  I should have de-cluttered before taking the picture, but I thought hey then the "After" pictures will look great, since I'm working with a budget anyway!

Another angle of our room, showing the door to our master bathroom.   The bathroom is not a big room and I didn't take pictures of that since I'm not doing anything to it now; we did do a little makeover about five years ago, so I'll work with the theme (beach) that is in there, as far as colors go and then include it in the over all "After" pictures in the end.  My challenge will be to tie together our love for family, the beach, and the country side of things, like barns, fields, etc...

This angle is of the entrance to our room.   The door to the left of the entrance is my closet, which is actually quite annoying since it goes down another three feet to the left of the door and is so hard for me to get some of my cloths in and out.   Ultimately I'd like to make that door opening wider and put in a slider or bifold door, but if you look you'll see the return register at the bottom and then the Heat/AC controls, which is a bit complicated to move,  and may not fit the budget.

So now you can see what I have to work with.  I'm debating whether to paint the doors and trim?  I sort of like them the dark cherry wood, believe it or not.  We shall see.

Trash to Treasures~

I am a shop-a-holic when it comes to Goodwill, Salvation Army and any other junk or second hand shop I can find!  I inherited my trained eye from my dad; he was an auctioner and sold antiques back in the day.  He still loves to find a gem and sell it on eBay.  I can't seem to part with much of my finds just yet, so I put them to good use.  No sense of having them if you don't use them, right?  I can't tell you how many dramas/plays, fundraiser dinners and weddings where I've used my treasures as props and decorations!   I've been collecting since I was a young teen.  It's my stress reliever once or twice a month I run into my favorite shop, do a once over scan, then if I have time I walk around again and dig a little deeper!   Nothing like finding a hidden green Forstoria sugar bowl for .97 cents!~

I try to budget myself to $5.00- $10.00 per visit and love when I come out spending less, which I do most times!   

The following is a collection of things I've accumulated over the years, that recently I used in a "vintage" styled wedding.  I'll post the inventory first and then pictures of the wedding. 

The Theme was Vintage, the colors were pale pinks, creams and lots of gold!

I'm a junkie when it comes to white wares!

Gotta love that gaudy candelabra!

I love tea cups!

Now look at what I did with most of the above!  

I used octagon mirrors on every table in order to really make all the extra candles sparkle!
Most of the frames from my inventory above were used for the table numbers and here is one of those very cool metal candle sticks with a lantern globe as all candles needed to be contained.  I loved this!!

I spray painted a bunch of large pinecones which a friend gathered for me on her vacation, and it was just enough to accent the beautiful white pitcher and with gold ting ting's coming out of the hydrangea and pink sweetheart roses.

This was a very cool "present" box that I found just a few days before the wedding and was so excited to use it!  The small candle sticks behind it held votive holders meant for candle sticks, again everything needed to be contained.  I found those at the Goodwill for .47 cents each!  

This sweet little sled and these cute little cherubim were last minute finds too.  This is probably my favorite table that day.  They didn't want it to be a Christmas Theme as much as a Winter Vintage.  They LOVED it!!

Here is another one of those pitchers with white hypericum berries, spray roses, babies breath, and some ivory sweet heart roses.  We used a lot of votives and all different kinds mostly with ivory candles, however I ran out and needed to use some pale pink I had left over from another wedding. 

This was a pretty little sugar bowl I had and it was the perfect match for that beautiful Cymbidium Orchid!

Here is that tacky candelabra!   Love it!  The brides bouquet sat in front of it, but I left after I decorated the reception site, so I missed getting a shot of that.  I didn't want to add flowers around that, as her bouquet was (if I do say so myself) stunning!   Simplicity is a beautiful thing!

Here is another metal candle stick that I picked up at the Salvation Army, it was  a green color and I sprayed it a rose gold, again added a lantern globe and some really pretty gold and glittery fruit candle ring...it was perfect!   I also used a sweet little limoge tea cup and saucer with some babies breath, spray roses and small little gold Christmas balls.   

This wire present box was making the mother of the bride a little nervous, she could not envision what I was telling her and was afraid it was going to look silly.  I mean it was only $1.97 at the Goodwill and it needed a coat of gold paint, but when all was said and done, she said this was one of her favorite tables.

Close up of those sweet cherubs!

I did manage to grab a shot with the grooms dress blues cover!  Sweet!

My large white pitcher became the perfect vase for a "wrong color" dark pink Stock flower arrangement which sat on the gift table in the foyer.  Sometimes Plan B is so fun!
  

Patience

Found the start of this blog in my draft today, dated 10/1/12....interesting.   Not sure what I was going to write, however, it was only days after that we took in a homeless young man, who still lives with us.

Interesting that I was prompted to write something about patience...I sure do need it today.   2/18/13

Stuck between "me of little faith" and "reality"...I'm my own worst enemy.

WARNING:  The following is just my ugly flesh speaking.

I'm not one to give up...but sometimes I do wander over there.

While I totally understand that the economy is not good, I get so frustrated with the way my husbands job is so affected by it, and even more so due to the unorganized ways of his boss. I don't feel he spends enough time getting onto all the estimates, in turn losses jobs, because there are so many out there under bidding just to get the job.  Which of course causes a whole other mess, because then his boss will often get the calls to come "fix" all the unprofessional work.  And while that sounds good in one way, the hellish reality is that most times they don't want to pay that much the second time around, and sometime they just don't pay.  But, since they need the work, they take the chance.   I truly hate the whole stupid cycle.  It's been six years now since my husband has been in the construction business, after being let go from almost 25 years in the auto industry and management.  He made too much money there and was let go because the over all department wasn't making their projected (conveniently unrealistic) goals.  My husband loves his construction job, and while I love that for him...I don't feel it's been the best for our family.  He tells me that's "my opinion."  ...apparently that doesn't count?

Funny, he is not the one struggling to not be too vain and mad about having to crazy glue two different caps onto my teeth, because I can't afford to have them fixed when the only options are dentures or implants.  I'm trying to stick it out as long as I can but when he tells me, "I worry too much about what other people think"  I keep reminding him that its "what I think about me that 'worries' me...and I was kinda hoping that he cared about that.    

I'm physically and mentally tired.  We have some really hard decisions in front of us, and I just want to cry.  Yes... I know God is in control, and I truly believe that.  I really have been so blessed...on so many levels.

But lately, things have been so tight that we've had to borrow money, to make ends meet, which is the first time we've ever done that in 28 years of marraige.  So yeah, the way things are looking I need to get a full time job, and honestly, it's the last thing I want to do... at least while I still have kids at home.   I consider being a mom the most important job I have already, especially in times like this.  Next to that I love my current "seasonal" Wedding Coordinator/Florist job and enjoy using my skill sets, and talents helping others save and have a beautiful wedding, however, without becoming a workaholic and investing some advertising money, that I don't have, I take them as they come and all word of mouth, which I'm very proud of, but they don't fill the calendar.   Which does not help when my husband is out of work.  ...another one of those vicious cycles.  

If I have to work in addition to all that I already do,  I am  looking for a job that allows me to get home before my kids from school, but I'm either under or over qualified...really?   How does one become overqualified for the types of jobs I'm looking for?  Shouldn't you be happy to have someone willing to work?


I am currently looking for jobs that fit some early skill sets that I enjoyed as a young adult, secretarial, office type work, which was before I was a mom and before I stopped being afraid to step out and use the talents I was born to use. Anyway, I've been volunteering at my church's office the last four months to sort of get some of those skills practiced again, just in case I need to do what is starting to look like the inevitable.

Ugh...life stinks right now, yet it really doesn't and I believe with all my heart that its all under God's control!  I just need to stop focusing up close and look at the bigger picture, right?  Sounds good.


We are never promised a rose Garden, and as much as I'm not feeling like I just want to give up....I'll admit, I do wander over there sometimes.

So all in all this rant is that I am fighting the need to get a full time job which will take me away from my small business, and keep me away from home and my kids more than I care to be.       They are growing up so fast, I don't want to miss one minute!

FYI...my husband is not insisting that I get a full time job, although he is certainly not against the idea either.   I'm just having a hard time sitting here waiting for a "better job" to just drop from the sky, and just deal with all the frustrations of him not working.   He tells me "I have little FAITH."   ...perhaps I do, but I'm stuck between "me of little faith" and "reality."   And something tells me the Lord doesn't want me stuck there.  


Ugly huh?   I know, right?   ...apparently I need to muster up more faith.


Pray with me, please!

Lord, please help me...I am sure I'm my own worst enemy.   I love my family, and I love the way you structured family to work, I love being a woman, a wife, a mother.   I want so badly to continue doing what you have called me to do under all three of those titles.   Forgive me Lord that my faith is apparently smaller than a mustard seed.   Help me to love my husband and to trust him...keep me from the worrying that he will be so foolish and allow the enemy to get a foothold and destroy us.
Take my life and make it yours, Lord.  Don't let me get in your way.  amen


Read this today on Got Questions.org

Following Jesus is easy when life runs smoothly; our true commitment to Him is revealed during trials. Jesus assured us that trials will come to His followers (John 16:33). Discipleship demands sacrifice, and Jesus never hid that cost.

John 16:33  I have said these things to you that in me you may have peace.  In the world you will have tribulation.  But take heart; I have overcome the world.



If you stumbled upon my ranting and have a thought about where I'm stuck...feel free to give me your opinion.  

2013, really?

Well, since I last blogged I did several Fall weddings, a fundraiser and a beautiful wedding the week  after Christmas!

I Love October Weddings!  

November  Wedding

The above was an eyesore the bride as that was where the altar would be for the ceremony, so I had the challenge of making it beautiful.   I had a ton of ivory chiffon and went to town using only rubber bands and then topped everything off with a beautiful gold leaf swag and frosted fruit.  It was the week before Thanksgiving so it fit beautifully, and I was very "thankful!"

More pictures to come...life got busy again!